Tuesday, November 22, 2011

We Make it Our Goal to Please Him!

Therefore we are always confident and know that as long as we are at home in the body we are away from the Lord. For we live by faith, not by sight. We are confident, I say, and would prefer to be away from the body and at home with the Lord. So we make it our goal to please him, whether we are at home in the body or away from it. For we must all appear before the judgment seat of Christ, so that each of us may receive what is due us for the things done while in the body, whether good or bad." 2 Corinthians 5:6-10

When I read this scripture this morning, my heart stopped, it's like a new revelation, yes I do good because my goal is to please Him who died for me.  I am in full time ministry because nothing brings me joy more than seeing people come to know Christ, or praying for the Lost in great anticipation of God's answer to my prayers and having the honor of at times being an answer to others prayers. The way we feel at Home is by doing God's work in this temporary world.  Pursuing to please the one we long to be with. 

When I was younger, my mom used to talk about how much she longs for Christ's return, and I would secretly hope it wouldn't be soon.  First, because I was afraid of all the commotion that would come about before His return but the biggest fear I had was of not having the opportunity to grow up and live out all my dreams.  I wanted to grow up and be a woman that would change the world, I had dreams and anticipations of being all I am and then Christ can come, after I fulfill my desires, reach my goals, achieved my success.  

As a grown woman, I look back and think of how foolish my desires were.  They were all self centered and self serving. See, I didn't long for my savior because I didn't understand what I was saved from.  I thought I was a good person who is good enough to consider God as my God and go to church on Sundays and pray for my family occasionally.  Life was about me, what I can do for others, I thought "I had the world on a string and the sting around my finger".  I was the end to everything and was completely blinded to the massive grace of God & the love that compelled him to send His one and only Son to die for my sin.  

Sin, what is sin? I would have asked, sin for me was the stuff bad kids did, not me.  I was blinded by my "good works" that stemmed from a desire to prove my righteousness to myself and others around me watching.  I had no understanding that what I was doing was worshiping myself and my flesh, I didn't know that the belief that the world revolved around me was SIN itself.  Oh how I pray the eyes of our hearts be opened each and everyday to acknowledge what type of sinners we are so we may experience the fullness of God's grace.  To know I have nothing good of myself and it's the most freeing knowledge.

"So from now on we regard no one from a worldly point of view. Though we once regarded Christ in this way, we do so no longer. Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, the new creation has come:The old has gone, the new is here! All this is from God, who reconciled us to himself through Christ and gave us the ministry of reconciliation: that God was reconciling the world to himself in Christ, not counting people’s sins against them. And he has committed to us the message of reconciliation. We are therefore Christ’s ambassadors, as though God were making his appeal through us. We implore you on Christ’s behalf: Be reconciled to God. God made him who had no sin to be sin for us, so that in him we might become the righteousness of God." 
2 Corinthians 5:16-21

Love you Jesus, thank you for calling me to an amazingly rich and completely addictive knowledge of you.  Your word brings me LIFE and renews my strength to live in this world as a stranger with the message of reconciliation to your people as I long for your return.  Because I fully know that there is nothing I desire more than YOU, because you are soooooooo deeeeeeeep, and full of truth and Life.  Thank you for forgiving my sin and calling me your daughter.


Saturday, November 5, 2011


Living for the Lord (his unseen kingdom) is a life of faith AND it often gets HARD.  It's hard to live a life that can in no way be controlled, manipulated, guided by one's own intellect, power or money.  It's a life of completet and utter surrender.  Surrender sounds like a very easy thing to do when we sing about it or talk about BUT it means being helpless or better yet powerless in the hands of another power, it's the act of submiting under another power.  In our case, in the hands of our creator, GOD.  It's giving our power and control up and submiting to the knowledge & power of the Lord and it's HARD. 

I want it in theory but in reality, I don't like it. It goes against everything my flesh desires, it goes against everything I was trained or "educated" to live my life.  It's HARD and could make one feel helpless and powerless.  If God wants us to surrender everything that we could ever want to do for ourselves to him, how do we embrace it without fighting it, how do we enjoy surrender?  I DON'T KNOW how to do it in my own strength, but I pray that the Lord would help me do it in his spirit.  His word says "not by might, not by power but by my spirit says the Lord."Zech 4:6

I resist surrender because it's a path of the unknown, it's a path that follws God's day to day call in my life but doesn't guarantee anything other than eternal life with Christ.  You may say, that's amazing, I want that but think again...that means not having a say in where you live, who you spend your time with, how you spend your time, how you spend your money, when you're going to move or how long you'll stay at your old boring and uneventful job or neighborhood.  It's a call to die to your flesh, your desires, any inkling of your thoughts and living it for HIM.  He gets to decide what you do, where you go, even what you eat.  You are choosing to be a servent better yet, a slave of Jesus Christ and it HURTS your flesh but it HEALS your soul.  It sobers up your mind and opens the eyes of your heart, you start looking to the needs of others than yours only and it is a greater calling because it satisfies your soul and it touches the heart of God.

Whether it's to God or our selfish desires, we submit to something...I chose to submit to his will and call in my life even though it's HARD.  What do you choose?

Romans 6:5-11 "...For if we have become united with Him in the likeness of His death, certainly we shall also be in the likeness of His resurrection, knowing this, that our old self was crucified with Him, in order that our body of sin might be done away with, so that we would no longer be slaves to sin; for he who has died is freed from sin. Now if we have died with Christ, we believe that we shall also live with Him, knowing that Christ, having been raised from the dead, is never to die again; death no longer is master over Him. For the death that He died, He died to sin once for all; but the life that He lives, He lives to God. Even so consider yourselves to be dead to sin, but alive to God in Christ Jesus."


Wednesday, October 5, 2011

You Complete Me!

What a lie the world told me growing up, always leading me to believe in a lie that will never ever satisfy. I thought a specific man aka my Prince Charming would satisfy me some day. That I'd meet him, fall in love, be all butterflies inside and I'd be satisfied. I also thought, my efforts of success would add another level of satisfaction, as I identify myself as super woman. Well, that's all a lie. A man will never complete me, as I am created to only be completed by God. I am created to only find true satisfaction and identity from the heavenly father who will ALWAYS complete me.

My fiance doesn't complete me, he just points me to Christ how unfair would it be for me to put that huge of a responsibility on a human being who is also a sinner saved by the grace of God and is called into a relationship with me solely to glorify the Lord through it. BUT God, God completes me, when I am so twisted in my own ways and clueless on what to do next, God swoops in and reveals himself to me. The truth of the Gospel message brings me back to my true identity, whom I'm created to be, needy and dependent on God and not on people or things.

My strength is found in being weak in my reliance on myself or others but only relying upon the Lord.
2 cor 12:19 But he said to me, "my grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness." There fore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ's power may rest on me.

What a blessing it is to just depend on the one who created us, on the one who delights in a relationship with us and on the one who loved us to the point of giving up his one and only sinless son for us.

Father, thank you for choosing me for this amazing relationship with you. I love you with all my heart and desire to know you more. You complete me!!


Thursday, August 25, 2011

ACTS of living for YOU

I'm reading through the book of ACTS in the Bible and have been extremely amazed by how the apostles lived their lives and died for what they believed in. Jesus was not a story in the Bible nor was He a means to an end to these people, He was REAL to them. They touched Him, saw Him, experienced His love and grace and they couldn't stop but SPEAK of His Kingdom. He was REAL to them, He was no fuzzy image in their minds, nor was He a moral police, He was REAL to them.

I want you Christ, to awaken my soul, make yourself REAL to me as you have made yourself known to your disciples. I want to see life in your sight and do things your way, I want to serve you Lord, not because it's the Holiest thing to do but because YOU deserve to be served with all I've got and I am. Lord, satisfy my hunger for your love by making yourself known to me. Show me how to live like you have lived, to love like you've loved, to serve like you've served and to be where you are. I have found my greatest joy in life, and it is you. Lord, I don't want fame or success in the worldly things, BUT I want abundance in my knowledge of you. May you always whisper your message of love in my heart, and may I take the time to listen.

Father, help me be centered in your being and not my strength. All I have is yours, LITERALLY! Everything I own, I love, I want, everything is yours and I thank you that you are my source of life. Thank you for loving me, I love you and if the only thing I can do for you is to obey you, I do it gladly Lord.

Father, thank you for letting me know you, recognize and adore you. I love you.

Umi :)

Wednesday, June 29, 2011

Things I love

Things I love,

Lindor Truffles

Pink flowers (roses & Gerber daises)

Wake up to birds chirping & sunlight through my window

The beach, Mountains & Trees…Hawaii

To imagine God’s gentle and loving hands over me.

Reading about a story of a girl (who ever, where ever, when ever, but I love to imagine I’m that girl on a journey)

Music that tells a story…about God, life, emotions…something that has meaning

My family….I love them to pieces, all of them, my immediate family, my aunts and uncles, my cousins, almost about 50 of them. Love them like crazy.

My best friend in the whole world and love of my life Ermiye...He's a gift from heaven and the joy of my heart.

Ethiopia…I love Ethiopia because I know I’m unique in the way I think and live my life because of my life experience there. What a beautiful place. Friends, I advise you to visit ;)

I love to learn…new things…activities, I love knowing how people think, why they chose to do the things they do.

I love to write there for, I love Journals…I think I’m a collector of journals because I have quite a few that I’ve accumulated over the years. If I go to Barnes and Nobel I’m bound to pick one up because being in that atmosphere makes me want to write but since I don’t carry around my journal I’ll just buy one J

I express myself through writing but I always forget to carry a small journal with me so you’ll find some kind of writing in my purse, back pack, pocket or wallet.

I love to write to God, most of my prayers are written because that’s how I connect to the Lord.

My friends…Oh my, they’re an extension of my family. You know who you are ;) I think I’m the most blessed person when it comes to having so many quality people in my life, quality meaning people who choose to live for the Lord and inspire others to do the same. It’s ridiculous how many of those I have in my life.

I want to write a book, don’t ask me about what cuz I have so many things /topics in mind. But I hope you’ll buy my book(s) one day ;)

My dream is to go back home and help people believe in themselves. I want to see the gentle hands of Jesus touch the poor and the weak, satisfy their spiritual hunger as well as their physical needs which is apparent.

I know God has a unique plan in my life and sometimes I feel lonely to carry it alone but then I remember what Dr. K told me, Eagles soar alone for a long time ;) and it encourages me to be an eagle in God’s kingdom.

Wednesday, April 6, 2011

Learn to sign!

If you've ever talked to a mother who has raised infants, she'll tell you the most helpless thing for her is to not be able to help her baby who is crying because he is frustrated out of wanting something but not being able to say it because he is not able to speak. To avoid this frustration on both ends, mothers have started teaching their kids sign language to give them tools to help them in expressing their feelings. By signing they can say, I'm hungry, I'm tired or I want more food. This enables mom to be helpful to her baby and the baby is a much happier one.

At times, I throw a fit at God because I don't know how to verbalize what's going on in my heart. I find myself frustrated, wondering why God would not answer when I don't even know what I'm crying about or even articulate what I'm crying about to him. As a woman in God's kingdom the biggest tool we can develop is understanding our own emotions so we can "sign to God". Now this doesn't mean that God is not capable of understanding our heart even if we don't.

I've learned that when I'm able to identify why I feel a certain way, I'm able to pray about it which brings relief and a specific focus on working on this issue. I also know what scripture I need to read to help me stand firm in God's plan for my life.

God is good, don't be too quick to throw a fit, instead get to know yourself, your emotions and tell him what you're feeling. Articulate your desire for him to fill you up with the knowledge of himself. Start a new...learn to sign.