When I read this scripture this morning, my heart stopped, it's like a new revelation, yes I do good because my goal is to please Him who died for me. I am in full time ministry because nothing brings me joy more than seeing people come to know Christ, or praying for the Lost in great anticipation of God's answer to my prayers and having the honor of at times being an answer to others prayers. The way we feel at Home is by doing God's work in this temporary world. Pursuing to please the one we long to be with.
When I was younger, my mom used to talk about how much she longs for Christ's return, and I would secretly hope it wouldn't be soon. First, because I was afraid of all the commotion that would come about before His return but the biggest fear I had was of not having the opportunity to grow up and live out all my dreams. I wanted to grow up and be a woman that would change the world, I had dreams and anticipations of being all I am and then Christ can come, after I fulfill my desires, reach my goals, achieved my success.
As a grown woman, I look back and think of how foolish my desires were. They were all self centered and self serving. See, I didn't long for my savior because I didn't understand what I was saved from. I thought I was a good person who is good enough to consider God as my God and go to church on Sundays and pray for my family occasionally. Life was about me, what I can do for others, I thought "I had the world on a string and the sting around my finger". I was the end to everything and was completely blinded to the massive grace of God & the love that compelled him to send His one and only Son to die for my sin.
Sin, what is sin? I would have asked, sin for me was the stuff bad kids did, not me. I was blinded by my "good works" that stemmed from a desire to prove my righteousness to myself and others around me watching. I had no understanding that what I was doing was worshiping myself and my flesh, I didn't know that the belief that the world revolved around me was SIN itself. Oh how I pray the eyes of our hearts be opened each and everyday to acknowledge what type of sinners we are so we may experience the fullness of God's grace. To know I have nothing good of myself and it's the most freeing knowledge.