Sunday, February 14, 2010
Who are you?
I had a fun evening with one of my close girl friends last night and we got talking about our experiences with dating and what we've learned through all those unique people that came into our lives. It got me thinking about the reason that I had decided not to continue with almost all of these men was because I realized that they had an idea of the woman they wanted to be with and whether it is knowingly or unknowingly they tried to make me change to fit their mold. Now, I'm not opposed to changing of Character, growing to know myself more and realizing my areas of growth as a person so that I may serve the Lord better. BUT, Most of these people just wanted something different that I couldn't offer and instead of fighting to hold on to them and change myself I chose to let them go, and I PRAISE the Lord for allowing me to recognize that whom he is making me to be is more valuable than a life-long partner I so longed to have.
What I wanted to share today is not about how many people I've dated...not too many I promise....but what gave me the strength to move on with my life believing that God has the right person for me, not a perfect man but just the perfect fit. Truly, I know that God has not invested this much time in me making me the person that I am and shaping and molding me into the likeness of Christ so that I may throw it all away one day when I meet a man!
I think the most mistake women make is placing a man before the Lord and completely loosing ourselves in a relationship that when we finally come to the realization that this man is "human" and will hurt us we can't find anything to protect ourselves with because we've already let go of our cover, which is our identity in Christ.
I read somewhere once "...When I go shopping I always consider the fabric, the fit and what I already have in my closet. Will my next purchase be a complementary addition to what I already have? If I find that I am going to have to buy shoes and matching accessories to go with a new outfit, I leave it right on the rack. It is too expensive a proposition. If the man you meet makes you feel that you need to completely reinvent yourself, something is wrong. This is where I ask you to consider the relationship in terms of cost. Is this relationship expensive spiritually, emotionally, or physically? Does your longing for a mate make you willing to forfeit who you are in the process? Or does he see you as the gift that you are? The man in your life should consider you as a rare find, a priceless jewel—because of you he is getting ready to get blessed big-time! Any relationship that causes you to feel unworthy, unlovely, unacceptable, undesirable, or that you have to work for love, is too expensive! God has called the man to cover, protect, and provide not only materially for a woman, but emotionally and spiritually as well. You should be richer in mind, body and spirit for your union with the man of your dreams. The man in your life should make rich deposits into your heart and spirit, not withdrawals." How true this is?
I thank the Lord for allowing me to know myself and my calling through knowing Him; therefore, I wouldn't compromise my vision, my calling, all in all my identity to have a man fit into it or vice versa. All it matters is how you view yourself not how the people around you view you, be encouraged that God did not bring you this far in your unique and purpose-filled walk with him that you may be emptied of all that to please a man or people. Stand firm on what you know to be you and if it so pleases Him let only the Holy Spirit change you, NOT MAN!